This 2020 Reflections post is part of the Litebeing’s Change Challenge with the theme: How have you changed internally? Can you share some new thoughts, ideas, projects, attitudes that have sprung up as a result of your evolution (of the past year of 2020)?

I can safely say that this past year, this year of the Corona virus, and of political and social unrest, my dragon has dredged up some deep inner issues. One of which was a physical issue that has been both terrifying and humbling.

One that sent my mind into fear, anger and hopelessness.

But the truth is the issue also pushed me into a deep connection to my soul, and a trust I have never experienced before.  It’s easy to trust our soul when things seem to be going well, but when our life feels like it’s falling apart, it’s much harder to believe in this transformational process.

Or that we are going to be able to embody spirit in this lifetime.

But I reached a point of do or die, in which I wouldn’t settle for anything less than experiencing the trust, and the joy, of my soul. I would walk this planet as a realized Master, or not at all.

To the average human, that sounds kind of crazy. But as a human who is in the process of integrating her eternal self, her soul, it’s right on target.

But it doesn’t happen all at once.  It takes time and it is touch and go.  It’s like any new relationship where both people are getting to know one another.  In this case, me and my soul. Can you imagine a melding of a skeptical, limited, and defensive human mind, with a trusting heart and a joy-filled, limitless and realized soul?

Not that my soul wasn’t right here with me all the time…..but the illusion of separation has been slowly dismantling.

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Image from Pixabay.com

This year yielded other deep issues to be acknowledged and cleared.  There was a financial scare, and then a relationship challenge.  Old fears were brought front and center, and I decided to accept them, and just invite my soul in to transform them for me. Fear was a big one, and shame and guilt. Feeling these emotions was uncomfortable, but I sensed they were coming up now for a final clearing. That sense of guilt for thinking I got things wrong, and for feeling obligated to take care of others emotionally…..this has been the year of clearing out all of that.

Fear of being abandoned by my soul. Feeling so vulnerable and alone in this very dense body and environment. The fear of living in a less than free human experience was very frightening.

I realized that I wasn’t here to depend on other humans but to completely surrender to the part of me that has been responsible all along for my care, my very soul.

So there it is:  the three critical issues we as humans seem to be dealing with.  Health, finances and relationships.  And, through those, the most important experience of all, feeling, sensing and seeing life from my soul’s perspective, and becoming fully conscious.

So, my dragon, the part of my soul that’s making sure I am well prepared for my embodiment, has been quite busy this year.

And what I learned through all these challenges is that things do work out.  Maybe not exactly like the human would expect.  But usually much, much better.

But I also learned that I had to experience some very uncomfortable emotions in the process.  And the most critical thing I learned is that, if I wanted to stay here as a conscious being, I had to surrender my life, my health, and my financial abundance to my soul.

Which meant I had to give up trying to figure things out for myself.  That was hard.

And it still challenges me.  But it’s the only way this works going forward.  Otherwise it’s going to really hurt to the point of not wanting to be here.

But that’s a good thing.  Because it’s those critical crossroads, those do or die moments, that shift our inner perspective from the frightened and doubt-filled human to the joy filled and confident soul.

I’ve been learning this past year that it’s not for my human self to figure anything out.  Especially as it relates to my embodied enlightenment. And when things seem to be going downhill, I now know that it’s just part of the process. That I’m just where I need to be.

Some people in 3D claim that the world is falling apart and it’s just getting worse and worse and we’re all headed for self-destruction, especially because of the Corona virus. They point out all the damage it seems to have brought to the economy and other systems.

But what appears to be chaos, and things disintegrating, is just symptomatic of change.  Of the old moving out and making way for a new perspective. It’s a clearing and cleansing.

And now I apply that truth to my own life, and my own body.

What appears to be a hopeless situation is simply the old energy clearing to make way for the new consciousness.  It’s making way for the light body.  For the soul.

And, it does take time, and that’s o.k.

It’s such a gift that this past year, when many found themselves staying home more, I found myself coming home to my sweet and loving and capable  soul.

And from that place, life has no choice but to serve me in the most fulfilling way.

© Copyright 2020 Maria Chambers, all rights reserved. Please feel free to share this content with others but maintain the article’s integrity by copying it unaltered and by including the author and source website link: Maria Chambers, http://www.soulsoothinsounds.wordpress.com

Image Credit : Maria Chambers

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Maria Chambers
I am a new consciousness teacher, helping to bring in the new energies through my art, music, spoken and written word. And by just hanging out at my local cafe, writing in my journal, and appreciating the simple things in life. I have my good days. I have my bad days. I prefer the good days. Of course, as enlightened beings, we’re supposed to say, “It’s all gooood!!!” Well, I finally gave myself permission, through this amazing and often crushing process of enlightenment…to not always like it…to curse at it…to tell it to go to hell!!! Being human isn’t as easy as it looks…being human and divine, well that’s even more tricky…as all of us know. My blog explores the process we are going through, and hopefully helps to answer some questions, helps to soothe any concerns, with wisdom and some humor.