who found themselves in a money-scam with a (former) friend.<\/p>\n
A = Arjun\u00a0 \u00a0\/\u00a0 Q = Questioner<\/strong><\/p>\n A: So what do you feel you have learned from this situation?<\/span><\/p>\n Q: Well, mostly that this person cannot be trusted. And that I should never ever do business with them again \u2013 that much is for sure\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n A: OK. Now then \u2013 how does this make you feel.. as a \u2018final conclusion\u2019 to this experience?<\/p>\n Q: (sighs) \u2026 Well \u2013 I actually wish it just wouldn\u2019t have happened. Thinking back of it all still makes me tired and leaves me feeling drained\u2026 I guess I\u2019m still angry with them \u2013 and disappointed \u2013 as we never got to resolve this conflict in a transparent manner and we may never be able to.<\/span><\/p>\n A: That \u2018drained feeling\u2019 you describe \u2013 \u00a0is a warning from your inner emotional guidance compass; letting you know you haven\u2019t found the actual \u2018gift\u2019 in this situation just yet.\u00a0 If we may be so bold to shine a light on this for you?<\/p>\n Q: Please, \u2026 go right ahead \u2026<\/span><\/p>\n A: OK. You see \u2013 your current final conclusion about this event; sharing that you found out that \u2018THEY cannot be trusted\u2019 is not about you. You made it all about them, again giving your power away \u2013\u00a0 dismissing your own manifestation element in the story line. Therefore this conclusion has you feeling drained afterwards, as it provides no nourishment to grow from for your \u2018spiritual Self\u2019 so to speak. So you keep on \u2018pushing\u2019 yourself to dig deeper and find another message in this all, one that helps you see another kind of bigger picture \u2013 one that leaves you feeling empowered!<\/p>\n Q: But if it isn\u2019t this \u2013 I mean \u2013 they did<\/em> cheat on me \u2026. then what could it be?<\/span><\/p>\n A: If you want \u2026 See if you can fill in the blanks in the following sentence<\/p>\n \u201cI can now see, feel and understand fully; how I (!) created this \u2026. (fill in blank) \u2026.. situation in my life to bring this \u2026.. (fill in blank) \u2026. insight ABOUT MYSELF \u2013 into my conscious awareness.\u201d<\/p>\n See? This is ONLY about you, not about the other.<\/p>\n Q: hmmm..<\/span><\/p>\n A: Now, if then you can even add the following part, then you KNOW you\u2019ve fully understood the message and have \u2018unwrapped your gift\u2019 so to speak.<\/p>\n \u201cI now feel richer, stronger and lighter, more complete in my vision of myself, because of this experience. It helped me find yet another piece of MYSELF that simply wanted my attention and therefore translated itself trough these particular circumstances.\u201d<\/p>\n Q: Ok \u00a0\u2013 I think I get it \u2013 but I need a moment to think about this\u2026Like\u2026 why then would I choose such negative circumstances to teach myself something?<\/span><\/p>\n A: First of all; all circumstances are fundamentally neutral. YOU provide meaning of them in your life. By calling them negative, the way you did just now \u2013 you basically say \u201cthis does not belong here\u201d and by saying that \u2013 you are again pushing away the gift that is hiding inside.<\/p>\n In your case; the situation with the person who broke an agreement with you, was simply \u2018the route of least resistance\u2019 for this message to come find you. And it had to be a bit, well let\u2019s say \u2018triggering\u2019, otherwise it wouldn\u2019t have gotten your full attention. Which is what you asked for on a higher level. You wanted<\/em> this to be obvious enough \u2013 to get your attention.<\/p>\n So, now you are invited to look at WHY you might have invited such a situation into your life. For it was just an invitation \u2013 as is everything else \u2013 to (re)discover more of who you prefer to be in any given moment and to find your ability to act on that.<\/p>\n Circumstances truly only become \u2018punishments\u2019 when you label them that way, but why would you want to walk around with that idea pressing down on your shoulders? (smiles)<\/p>\n Q: haha \u2013 pfff yeah, tell me about it.<\/span><\/p>\n A: So drop it. Drop it and replace it by a definition that helps you grow instead of shrink with fear. Now if you like; try again: why have you chosen to manifest these circumstances into your life?<\/p>\n Q: To get my attention\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n A: To discover what? About yourself?<\/p>\n Q: To discover I was giving my power away\u2026because I thought I needed this person\u2026 I did \u2013 it was so naive\u2026 I ignored so many red flags along the way\u2026.<\/span><\/p>\n A: OK \u2013 good. So what you\u2019re actually saying is: all along this situation, your intuition was surprisingly \u2018spot on\u2019 and you choose to experiment with the idea of ignoring this. So really; you choose to not trust yourself?<\/p>\n Q: Yes \u2013 yes I suppressed my own insights.<\/span><\/p>\n A: Why?<\/p>\n Q: I was afraid to hurt this other person if I would tell them my truth..<\/span><\/p>\n A: But if you would have, you might have brought an end to the whole drama much earlier, preventing it from exploding in your face the way it did now right?<\/p>\n Q: haha yeah .. that pretty much sums it up.<\/span><\/p>\n A: So what does that tell you about YOU???<\/p>\n Q: That I CAN trust myself\u2026 I just need to give myself permission to express what I feel inside\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n A: And can you now see that what this other person reflected to you was just what you needed to see about yourself? They may have showed you \u2013 that \u2018you couldn\u2019t trust them\u2019 \u2013 as you say \u2013 but in fact they showed you; you weren\u2019t trusting yourself. And by showing you this in such an outspoken manner as by taking your money without asking permission \u2013 they in a sense \u00a0\u2018sent you back to yourself\u2019\u00a0 so that you could see this for yourself and learn something from it about YOURSELF.<\/p>\n Q: Yes \u2013 this is true\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n A: Quite a favor they did you don\u2019t you think? (smiles)<\/p>\n Q: Hahaha!! Well I don\u2019t know If I\u2019d go that far\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n A: Why not? Because your society tells you things like THIS cannot be seen as a favor? Try it: How does it make you feel to see it that way \u2013 just try\u2026if you want. You can always drop it if it doesn\u2019t feel right for you.<\/p>\n Q: True\u2026 Looking at it that way actually feels quite good. It does. It seems crazy \u2013 but it does.<\/span><\/p>\n A: Now, does this help you? Can you move from here and play with this for yourself?<\/p>\n Q: Yes. Yes I can \u2013 thank you \u2013 Thank you so much!<\/span><\/p>\n A: You are welcome!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" You see \u2013 your current final conclusion about this event; sharing that you found out that \u2018THEY cannot be trusted\u2019 is not about you. You made it all about them, again giving your power away \u2013 dismissing your own manifestation element in the story line. Therefore this conclusion has you feeling drained afterwards, as it provides no nourishment to grow from for your \u2018spiritual Self\u2019 so to speak. So you keep on \u2018pushing\u2019 yourself to dig deeper and find another message in this all, one that helps you see another kind of bigger picture \u2013 one that leaves you feeling empowered!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":34,"featured_media":11959,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1287,13],"tags":[932,26,518],"class_list":{"0":"post-11958","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-arjun","8":"category-knowledge","9":"tag-cheating","10":"tag-living-librarian","11":"tag-wieteke-koolhof"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11958","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/34"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11958"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11958\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":14183,"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11958\/revisions\/14183"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/11959"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11958"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11958"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/livinglibrarian.com\/new\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11958"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}