Nisargadatta, I am trying to get into his writing, I am that. I believe he is the one who said something to the effect of, I am a simple man, I have little education. He stayed in his house above the streets all through his house, visitors from all over the world cramped into his humble lodgings. Do not hang my photo, do not make me a god, he said. That is what struck me about these Indian mystics of the early 1900’s, they have little education but possessed the ultimate truth.

That truth is so mind blowing, it makes me wonder why not everyone possesses it because it is simple. That there is the SELF in us, the SELF is the absolute, immutable, unchanging. The “I” the phyical “I”, this body we re incarnate into, it is not real. It is just a vessel. Its mind cannot access the absolute, science, thinking cannot access the absolute.

Sink into your inmost self in silence and you find the SELF, the Absolute which was from the beginning and from before the beginning. The Absolute is what I called God, this means we are gods. Hence I give my SELF, the name GodSelf.

Sink into the Absolute and the Absolute will lead the way. The Absolute is our guru. This means, we are our own masters. I close my eyes and sink into myself, into that nothingness and feel with my heart. Therein is truth and what is real. If I look at this long enough, I will be able to sense what is real and what is not real.

Going on big platform, is that real? I tried it once, shot myself onto Kevin Moore, launched into JeffMara, aiming for Next Level Soul podcast and the latter was cut from me. I fell with a thud and looked around me. I was not hurt, just a bit stunned. I thought that was the right right but it was cut from right under me, at almost the last hour, this means it was not the right path spirit wanted me to take.

I picked myself up and found myself led into Ramana Maharishi from the Autobiography of a yogi. What does that tell me? That my path is more like them, teaching in obscurity. Not this, not that, not all that glitters but what shines from within.

I desire one thing, to be like Ramana Maharishi in one field, the ability to help, heal, serve through my very presence. That they who come to me, draw close to me would experience that Diving Light. I know I have it with hospice patients, especially the actively dying. I do not have to say anything. I just sit there and my very presence bring them peace. After a while, am observant nurse started suggesting I could sit with this or that patient of hers. I asked her, if she noticed anything about my sitting with them. She said yes, they always become more peaceful. It was gratifying having her affirm that.

I find that so beautiful about Ramana Maharishi, teaching by his silence. I wonder also how anyone could sit for hours, lost in that SELF or the Absolute. But then I once wondered how anyone could live dedicated to a cause or to spirituality and I am doing that today. Tomorrow, I might be able to do the same, somewhat.

That always intrigued me. How could Buddhist monks sit for hours? I tried to emulate that. That was my goal for a while. Four years ago, I decided to do it. I went into private retreat. Instead of doing 4 hours of meditation spread out, the way we did it at the monastery, I did it at one sitting, at a church nearby. It was hard, very hard but possible. I did 5 hours once only. 5 hours was very hard. I did it one other time only. I never reached the goal of 8 hours.

How is it possible? Some wondered. It is only possible because when we reached that inner state of stillness, we enter into a state of trance where time is irrelevant and ceased to be somewhat. I could sit for an hour, open my eyes, felt it was 20 minutes when it was an hour. These days I sink into that silence and now and again, I entered that space which is other worldly. When one is there, one knows it is other worldly. It is like being rapt into heaven on earth. One goes so deep into that inner silence, one enters into a deep state of trance. Coming out of it, the state remains for a while. Once in it, one does not want to leave it. Would one want to leave heaven? The thought always is, now I have it, I want to stay in it as long as possible. If you get into it, you will get into it again, my mind told me. I would accept that and leave the meditation.